Pinkie Gets a Haircut
by fallingwall17
Summary: When Pinkie gets her hair get, a tale of adventure, action, and not really love ensue.


**Pinkie Gets a Haircut**

" Are you ready for your haircut?" Rarity asked. "Sure am!" Pinkie replied. "Ok how do you want it styled?" Rarity inquired. Pinkie thought it over for a few minutes before exclaiming " Afro flat top!" Rarity stared at pinkie for a few long seconds before asking "How would that work?" "I want an afro at the bottom, but the flat top!" Pinkie said with a hint of excitement in her voice. "That's the dumbest idea I've ever heard" Rarity stated flatly. " Well your hair isn't so great, who are you tell me how my hair should look?" Rarity stared at Pinkie Pie for a long time before slapping her in the face, knocking a tooth out. Pinkie got up and tackled Rarity in rebellion, not a smart move because Rarity had scissors. Rarity stabbed Pinkie repeatedly, until Pinkie passed out from loss of blood.

Pinkie awoke in the hospital, to screams of panic. She shot upright, and had a pain in her arm where Rarity stabbed her. She ignored it and looked out the window. Smoke spread through the sky, and attempted to cast a shadow of eerie darkness throughout the town. It's attempts were brought to a halt by the blaze that ensued beneath its grip. The suns light blotted out, the flames were all that lit the town, and the faces of the screaming ponies within.

Pinkie followed the smoke trail to the building it came from. Then it hit her. Before she went to get a haircut she had put in a batch of cupcakes at Sugarcube Corner. When she passed out the cupcakes caught on fire. The town was made of highly flammable buildings. Twilights library burned almost instantly, because a tree filled with books isn't fire resistant to say the least.

Pinkie slipped outside and headed for the outskirts of Ponyville where everypony gathered to watch their homes burn. There she met Rarity, who was pained to look at the town, and her boutique, burning. When Pinkie whispered to her what happened she most likely went pale, under her white fur. She wanted to look away, but couldn't.

After the town burned down, the ponies of Ponyville had two choices. They could go to Canterlot where Celestia would gladly house them with their rich economy, or cross the Everfree forest, into the desert wastelands. The chose the desert. As the passed through they forest gathered wood for their new town. They found a nice place in the desert, with no water, or no way to support agriculture. They settled here, giving up hope on life, but not wanting to seem like quitters.

3 years later the lowly town had become a booming city. All the street lights were strobe lights with disco balls under each one. Those prone to seizures were banned from the city because they would barely be able to move without an attack. Cloudsdale was moved directly above it. The prostitutes were expensive, the food was alcoholic, and the beverages were strong. Every alleyway had a drunk man passed out, a prostitute making a deal, or a mixture of the two. There were 10 casinos on each block, and 15 banks. The gun store got plenty of business, and the ponies were rarely sober.

Out in the distance, something unexpected happened. A stampede of giraffes trampled a rhino, then stopped and kicks its ribs in. As they were assaulting the helpless rhino Pinkie took notice.

Pinkie sprang into action! She ran to the nearest phone booth and became SUPER P. Then she punched a giraffe in the face, making its head implode. The other giraffes ran away in fear. Then Pinkie attended to the rhino, injured on the thin desert sand. She used telepathy to tell the rhino's brain to make it better so it did somehow. The rhino got up and thanked super P then trotted off.

As Pinkie watched the rhino trot into the orange sunset, Rarity approached. " I wonder what would have happened if we never got in a fight." she stated, staring into the sunset as well. " I don't know, but im SUPER P!" Pinkie replied.

Suddenly a meteorite landed in front of them with tremendous force. Rarity was knock unbalanced by it, but Pinkie was knock flat on her butt. Pinkie slowly reached out and touched it, when it happened. Pinkie Pie was no longer super P, but instead, super Pee Pee! Urine sprayed all over her and Rarity with tremendous amounts of thrust. Rarity ran behind a rock, soaked in pee, then peeked out to see Pinkie flying into the air from the thrust the urination supplied.

Pinkie went into the atmosphere and became, super, flaming Pee Pee, then jetted into space, where, due to the lack of oxygen, she went back to just super Pee Pee. There she flew, off into what seemed like oblivion. She gave up hope, but none could have predicted what would happen next.

Back in Equestria, Applejack ate ramen noodles. Mmmmm ramen.

Months later, Pinkie entered the atmosphere of another faraway planet. She turned back into Super flaming Pee Pee, that is until she did a face plant into the ground, stopping, and dropping. Then the urine coming from here back end caused her to do a summersault across the dusty red planes of the mysterious planet, thus completing the roll.

She was stopped by two giant banana men. They grabbed her arms and got her upright. Unfortunately the thrust from the pee just shot them back into space.

At only a slightly slower rate of time than the trip there, Pinkie returned to Equestria and landed in the city, which had now been name .

(fill-ees-fome-ville-dayl-town-stun-eeaah) Here with the help of her friends she learned to control her powers, and not fly into space. Whenever she headed back into the heavens, somepony shot her, thus redirecting her flight.

Unfortunately, after 4 years of being shot once or twice a day, Pinkie got a neocroptic sac that swelled until it exploded. Her heart stopped beating, her diaphragm stopped contracting, and her bladder stopped leaking. Pinkie had died.

1 day later, Rarity, dressed in a dark cloak and hood, visited Pinkies grave. She dug up her body. Rarity came to retrieve something. She investigated the desecrated corpse until she found the potions she had come for. In the past decade, the six friends had been executing a plan for their beloved servant Spike.

Ten years ago it had occurred to Twilight that Spike would outlive them all by hundreds of years. She didn't like the idea of having Spike go through the grief of losing multiple generations of friends, so she devised a plan. She had Zekora craft 12 amnesia potions. Two for each of the six friends. One in case the other got lost or they wished to pass one on to their offspring. The other, to be applied when they passed away.

Rarity was now living in a stylish cave with Spike, of course they had no children, but they had tons of gems. If they ever felt the need for children the could always adopt. She brought the potions back, and gave one to Spike. She reintroduced all the things in the world to Spike, except, for Pinkie Pie.

Was it an abomination? Was it an act of kindness? The answers to these questions are up to you, but in a way, it may be both. Some might say the memory, of one is their life, and the effects they had upon the world. So would erasing Pinkies memory, partly kill her? Its all about your philosophy. Do you want to know what I think? Too bad read it anyway. I think, who cares? It's a dumb fan fiction. Its not even canon. Its like a fake version of something that's fake. Its dumb, and should not be taken literally. K bye.


End file.
